In many cultures there is no space for miscarriages, abortions or stillborn babies when we think about significant events in a woman’s and her partner’s life, or even when we talk about birth or doulaing, and yet despite all of these situations being very different, they are all births. Until now, it is only in the Japanese culture that I've seen a more than medical acknowledgment of these babies and they are called Mizuko or ‘water babies’.
During a miscarriage, stillbirth or abortion, your body goes through a labour, you birth a being and experience a postpartum period which like every birth is an intricate mix of both physical and emotional change. Your body can take up to a few weeks to complete this process, whilst for many women the emotional journey will be a lot longer, if not ongoing.
Having gone through months of what felt like living in a bubble of my own grief, I offer women, and where possible their partners the emotional and physical support during this period as you welcome and release your water baby.
As your doula, the services I offer include:
- Support on making an informed choice on your holistic and clinical options*
- Go through what to expect physically*
- Assist on making a plan for before, during and after*
- Guidance on how to look after and nourish yourself before, during and after*
- Go over your experience with you*
- Ongoing support reassurance and comfort via skype, whatsapp and phone
- Organising a ceremony to acknowledge, welcome or say goodbye to your little one
- Creating a foodie doula package of nourishing meals to help replenish your mind, body and soul
*I offer these services for free, but charge a small fee if you require meals and/ or the ceremony.
Marie Stopes: Offer counselling to anyone who wants to talk through their options before an abortion or who needs support after.
BPAS: Offer advice, support and services for women and couples who are considering abortion and run over 70 clinics in the UK.
SANDs: Stillbirth and neonatal death charity provide support for all family members affected and have an online community and helpline
At A Loss: A specially curated search tool helping you find the most suitable support for you and your family
Liberty: Offer a wide range of support to women and families who have experienced miscarriage, stillbirth, terminations or need non-judgemental help and support.
TAMBA: Bereavement support for families after the loss of a child or all children in a twin or multiple birth.
Children of Jannah: Support for Muslim women and families after the loss of a child.